The BOMb Project

When I was 13 we moved to Lusk, Wyoming.  It is a small town with many religions and few Mormons.  My foundation in the church was solid for a 13 year old.  I spent my short life going to Primary each Sunday, singing and learning about Jesus Christ.  I believed every word.  When I was 12 I looked forward to Young Women each Sunday and absolutely LOVED my advisers and their influence in my life.  You could bet that Tuesday nights I was at the church for mutual.  The basics of the Mormon religion were the foundation for my life.

When we went to church that first week in Lusk my life changed.  There were no other kids.  There were only a few older couples.  Four, who's memory I still carry.  We met in a HOUSE that was converted to a church, kind of.  There were not enough adults to teach all the organizations.  So my older brother who was 15 went to Priesthood with the old guys.  I went back to Primary with my little brothers.  Our teacher was Shawna.  She would ask questions.  I would answer.  My brothers played with the chairs and messed around.  The third hour of a normal church service was cut out due to the lack of bodies and the overage of callings to fill.

As we grew, different arrangements were made in an attempt to fulfil our needs at a spiritual level.  I vaguely remember Sunday School but seriously, my dad was the teacher and my brothers were my class mates.  There was a short time where we had a Seminary lesson for Sunday School because again. . .who was gonna teach Seminary every morning AND Sunday School on Sunday?  I also had a Young Women leader, Eva, and I went to her house for activities.  That was the closest thing to normal for me.  But what more can you do when callings are already overlapping and there is nothing left to give?  We did what we could with what we had I suppose.     

At a most impressionable age in life, my impressions were dropped drastically and I thought it was cool to "only" have to go to church for two hours.  I didn't realize, and wouldn't for years to come, that my foundation, my knowledge of the gospel, my testimony stopped.  I did not progress beyond a Primary child's knowledge or understanding in the gospel.

At school I was the only Mormon in my class.  My brothers, the only other Mormons in school.  People around me called each other "Mormon" as if it was a huge insult.  Like being called an idiot or stupid.  I quickly called them on it and it stopped real fast.  And from then on I was known as the Mormon girl.  They were trained not to swear around me because I hit them every time they did.  Later in high school they didn't invite me to parties because I didn't drink.  I had few dates to few dances.  Forget about boyfriends.  I was the girl that didn't swear, drink, or have sex. 

That seemed to be the extent of my life as a Mormon.  We read scriptures as a family every morning before school but let's be honest. . .what teenager gets anything out of scriptures at 6:30am?  I went to church and kinda got spiritual uplifting.  Or at least a reminder of what I was.  

Life went on.  I went to college.  I got married.  I served in various callings.  I had kids.  My little Peyson soon had the ability to tell me what he learned in Nursery.  I realized it was time to start implementing the gospel and its teachings in our home.  So with a toddler we attempted reading scriptures as a family.  It was a constant battle and of course I got nothing out of it but dread and exhaustion.  And truthfully, one chapter each night with said war on my hands, there was no testimony growing going on in me.

At a point of huge struggle for me, when my health was completely debilitated, and I could do nothing else but turn to the Lord for help, I found the Book of Mormon.  It was the first time in my life that I actually read AND studied AND pondered its words.  I felt the spirit on a daily basis and I was strengthened.  Soon I was strong and my daily routine changed and reading the Book of Mormon fell less important and soon forgotten.

It was not until this spring when I fully understood and appreciated the importance of The Book of Mormon and the effects it can have on my life and the lives of any who open it and read it.  I was serving as Young Women Secretary.  Our theme for the year was "Arise and shine forth, that thy light may be a standard for the nations."  D&C 115:5  As a presidency we felt it important for the youth to read the Book of Mormon.  You can't share your light if you don't have it to begin with.  To make it effective we put a time limit on it.  The faster you read something, the more it becomes a story you can understand and follow.  One chapter a day won't give you that.

4 months.  16 weeks.  It was our BOMb Project.  Our goal was to start in January and end in May.  We even had a little competition with the Young Men.  I was excited and ready to participate.  We kept track of how much we read each day and were held accountable individually as well as a group on what we accomplished.  I found how difficult it was to stay caught up and I fell behind often.  But I wanted to give my points as part of the competition for the girls and had a lot of catching up to do.  But at some point along the way I started reading it for me.

I have been blessed with the ability to believe.  I have never doubted what I have been taught.  I have never had the desire to disobey and my road of faith has been extremely easy.  But because of this blessing it has in some ways hindered my need to not only believe but to KNOW.  I believed that Jesus Christ lived and died for the sins of the world.  I believed He lives again.  I believed He is our Savior.  I didn't need to pray about it.  I believed it.

It wasn't enough.  When I got to 3rd Nephi, I finally KNEW.  3rd Nephi is when the people experience great destruction because of great wickedness.  3rd Nephi is when prophesy given by ancient Prophets is fulfilled.  3rd Nephi is when Jesus, Risen Lord, comes to the Americas to minister to his people.    3rd Nephi is when the Spirit whispered to me that Jesus Christ does live.  He is my Savior.  He died for me.  He lives now so I can too.  He knows me.  He loves me.

Everyone who is part of the Mormon church is a convert.  I have grown up in the church, I have lived it all my life, I have believed it all my life..  But not until now have I KNOWN with all that I am that it is true.  I have been converted and my heart is full.  I also know that nobody can open that little blue book and with real intent search for truth and NOT find it.  It is true and I KNOW IT.