When the nurses on the mom baby floor of the hospital found out about Ainslee being in the NICU one commented...she's a girl...she's already doing her job...high maintenance:) The fact still remains. High maintenance...or maybe just fragile!Yesterday we went in to check her oxygen level. She was so good...her dose is down to the lowest it can be. However, her biliruban numbers keep going up. For now she doesn't have to have light therapy...but we had to test her again today. My poor girl...her feet are so full of sad little pokes...and her little cry every time. It's just so sad. And just from yesterday to today she lost 3.5oz. It doesn't sound like much but it kinda is and its not so good. I'll have to supplement with formula for the day and see what she looks like tomorrow when we go back in to get her oxygen tested again.
All through this pregnancy my constant prayer was that this little girl would come to us healthy and strong and that she wouldn't be taken from us. It is still my constant prayer, maybe even more yearning involved. From the time she was born and throughout all of her testing and minor complications I have felt calm, that everything would be ok, that I had nothing to worry about. But day after day and test after not so good test, it is starting to wear on my little mommy heart. Tears have come and just won't stop. I like to think there is nothing to worry about, but it doesn't make the worry go away.
I would like this fragile little girl to save her high maintenance for her teenage years. It will give me more time to prepare.
7 comments:
I wish I could come and just sit with you. I'm sad things are not just perfect, because I know that's always what you hope and plan for. We will pray for her :)
Oh, Laura. There's just too much with a newborn to have anything else happen. I'm so sorry. I wish you were next door right now.
She's doing great! She will be fine! What a miracle that she has all her parts and she is a beautiful healthy baby! This struggle will pass! I know that when my twins were in the NICU for 2 weeks, I had worries too. Mind you they were half the weight of your baby doll...but focus on those feelings of peace! Heavenly Father is trying to tell you that it will be okay! Best of luck and happy speedy health!
Just thinking and praying about you and your beautiful baby.
Our prayers are with you guys. Hang in there...our little one was in the NICU as well...it is no fun- I had a few break down days- it gets better though :)
High maintenance and just wanting to tan! :) You'll be cuddling that little girl...no "strings" attached...in no time! Prayers for you and her. You'll make it through this! She is a sweetheart! :)
I just love her little hat! Hopes and prayers for your little family. She will be fiine....She just needs some adjustment time. She is testing you for the what the future holds! I <3 U! xoxo
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